LGBT Evangelism Story “Tom” (Cambodia)

A woman who identifies as a man, “Tom” is a 60-year old former soldier. “Khmer Rouge?” “Awt-tay” (No), she assured. Living with her extended family who addresses her as “Pa” at an entrance to Angkor Wat, she climbs trees to gather unusual forest fruit to sell in front of the house (common in rural Cambodia).

Just a couple of miles from home, the heavily touristed “ancient palaces” of Angkor Wat were built by King Suryavarman II in the 12th century when our region was the capital of the Angkor Empire. The pride and heritage of Cambodia, the temple complex is one of the few parts of the country where jungle and trees have not yet been cut to make way for farming.

The “Ancient Palaces” of Angkor Wat, UNESCO World Heritage Site; Siem Reap, Cambodia

Cambodians visit for free. Foreigners pay a hefty $37 fee. After 5:30pm, all enter for free. A few months ago, Rebekah suggested biking there with neighborhood kids. Similar enough to a Cambodian look, she passed the guard station without question. When the guards stopped me, I took a seat at the nearest house with a fruit stand out front to wait until 5:30. That’s where I met “Tom”. Toward the end of a getting-to-know-you conversation, I shared my ex-gay testimony.

When I returned to follow up, she said she had recently received Covid jab #1 (of 2) and had been suffering with symptoms, including agitation of a pre-existing heart condition. Later she shared that she falls out of a tree in the line of work roughly once per year. The Lord led to get her some medications and pray with her. That seemed to pave the way for the next visit. Our lives but a vapor, any of us could be taken at any moment. It was a good time to talk about the Lord.

Cambodian culture calls for extended conversations. Lasting around two hours, this was one of them. Note that this is a relatively new, budding relationship. My Cambodian witnessing partner was key in bridging the cultural divide. The two immediately began small-talking. The family shared fruit from the forest with us. Typically that means we have a conversation about which fruit is sweet and which is sour and who likes sweet and who doesn’t like sour.

We bought some pineapple from them and bonded. Cambodian women softly say “Jaa” for “Yes”, while men bark “Baht”. Tom says “Baht” and speaks of a “propun” she had in the past (word used for “wife” but likely not legally married). In favor of first building a firm relationship upon which to share a gospel that is alien to her, I overlooked such references. I pulled down my mask a bit to show a smile, crucial to social interaction in Southeast Asia. Roughly 30 minutes into the conversation, I noticed that her body language (legs crossed, ankle to knee) matched mine. This is very unusual posture within the culture. It seemed like a good time to begin with our questions.

In seminary, I have studied Buddhism and verified the claims of academia with Cambodians. Understanding what counterfeit paths Satan has ingrained in people is vital to effectively witnessing within a given cultural context. The root problem for Buddhism is suffering. The meaning of life is to end suffering. Buddhism teaches that suffering is rooted in one’s attachments and desires, which must be broken, in order to break the unsatisfactory cycle of reincarnation and enter nirvana.

An Apologetics class requires several field assignments. The Lord has used them to drive evangelism. We asked, ‘If there is a God who is good and loves us, why is there so much evil in the world?’ She said it is because people covet and gave examples regarding motorbikes and cars. This is in keeping with Buddhist teaching that holds covetousness as the highest wrong and source of suffering. We asked, ‘Do you like freedom? Do you think it is good?’ Yes, she agreed that freedom is good. We asked, ‘So that genuine freedom could be obtained, don’t you think we must have the option to do right and wrong, to be good or evil?’ She agreed.

She said God revealed Himself to her in a dream. She said people might say it was a ghost, but she knew it was God. Tom went to her bedroom and returned with the tattered cover of a children’s Bible storybook illustrating baby Moses. She said someone borrowed the contents and spoke highly of it – ‘true, good’ stories.

She said she follows all religions. We read Exodus 20:3-6 where the Lord commands us not to worship idols, graven images or any other gods. She did not rebuttal. Using her watch as an example, I asked, ‘If one person says that is a watch and another says it’s a shirt and another says it’s pants, can they all be right?’ She agreed and said that she believes in “Preah” (God). I reiterated that Jesus is the one and only God. She agreed. Then I shared the gospel message. She seemed to agree, but it is common here to verbally agree in order to be polite and avoid argument.

Looking at the tattered shell of that children’s Bible storybook, I asked if she wants a Bible. “Baht,” she replied. Then I asked if she would join us for church. She said she needs to be home when customers come. Her large family is more than capable of handling the few customers that stop by during this slow season. But her answer to this question was key. It exposed fear. Taking such a bold step away from Buddhism would be viewed as rejection of family, dishonoring ancestors and culture. I asked if we could pray with her. We did. The following morning, I returned with a Bible.

The road to Tom’s house was closed for a while for the Delta Variant but then re-opened. When I stopped by to visit before our most recent lockdown, she was feeding chickens out back. She pulled up a chair for me, and we talked for a while. She said she reads some of the Bible ‘when she remembers’. She asked for clarification on whether or not Jesus likes homosexuality. I told her that Jesus loves everyone but that He created male and female, not a “third sex” (common term for LGBT here), that two men together or two women together is sin. She quickly cut me off and changed topics.

Just like in the U.S., younger folks tend to be much more open to the gospel. At 60 years old, it would be quite a miracle if she were to come to Christ. Praise the Lord for opportunities to share the life-changing gospel of Jesus Christ! Continuing to pray for Tom…

“So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.” Romans 10:17

Mansion over the Hilltop

Praise the Lord!

“In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also. And whither I go ye know, and the way ye know. Thomas saith unto him, Lord, we know not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way? Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” John 14:2-6

This is English and Tagalog. My wife is from the Philippines (Tagalog language, a nation of islands, mostly Catholic). 🇵🇭

We serve in Cambodia (Khmer language, between Vietnam and Thailand, mostly Buddhist). 🇰🇭

Both people groups eat mostly “rice and noodle”-based dishes. Same region (Southeast Asia), different countries.

2020 Ministry Recap

Prayer Partners:

Thank you for your faithful support!

2020 was tough. We trust that one day we will look at Covid in the rearview mirror. But through it, the Lord reminded that suffering yields gratefulness for blessings big and small. Even the most bitter of unbelievers will have a testimony of thankfulness for simple things that we all previously took for granted – such as eating in a restaurant with family.

“My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.” James 1:2-4

2020 began with a much longer-than-expected stay in the U.S. The Lord used it. Many believe that they were born “gay”. Fighting back lies with truth, getting ex-gay testimony out there is vital. To recap highlights:

My testimony is not about me. It’s about what the Lord did for me, that He can do the same for anyone who is willing to repent and fight to follow.

The Lord Jesus Christ is truly “The God of the Impossible”.

“With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.”   Matthew 19:26

Click here to read more about 2020 U.S. ministry.


In late October, we arrived in Cambodia and hopped back into the saddle. Highlights:

Evangelism with a Focus on Reaching the LGBT:

“Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.”   Mark 16:15

“Long time, no see!” gave way to opportunity. Two men came to church with us.

Sharing Ex-gay Testimony in Cambodian Churches & Schools:
Before Christmas, I was honored to shared at a Bible school. Click below for video excerpts:
I shared, and we sang at another church in the capital city this past Sunday. Five more churches are on deck. Praise the Lord!

“Satan, which deceiveth the whole world… And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.” Revelation 12:9-11

Teaching Neighborhood Children:
Against much opposition from culture and family, our neighborhood students are growing and did an excellent job again this year performing in church. Praise the Lord!

Click here for more Christmas Ministry photos.

“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”   Proverbs 22:6

At 6pm that same evening, the students and their families joined us for Christmas dinner at a Korean restaurant.

Similar to last Christmas, the gospel – including the Second Coming of Christ – was shared prior to asking the blessing. Tracts were made available.

Buddhism focuses on “being a good person” / doing good. It can appear that the Christian is likewise “just trying to be a good person”. This confusion leads people to believe that “All religions are basically the same” and steers them around the cross to everlasting damnation. With unbelieving parents in attendance, my wife suggested that I use this occasion to clarify.

“…seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils” 1 Timothy 4:1

“For laying aside the commandment of God, ye hold the tradition of men…” Mark 7:8

So I worked with our Cambodian language teacher to get the proper words necessary to convey that message clearly. I shared that we do not “do good” because we are trying to “be good people” but because we want to point them to the Lord Jesus Christ – the only One who can save them… so that they will be ready to meet Him when they die. Click below for video excerpts:

Much thanks to Aunt Bobbie who contributed to bless the kids and their families for Christmas, 2020 & 2019.

Praise the Lord!

Ways to Partner with Us:
1. Pray for:
– Conviction, eyes to see and ears to hear for the LGBT.

– Revival for the U.S. – that we would stand for all timeless, Bible truth in these days no matter what the cost.
– Spiritual fruit from U.S. church engagements.
– Open hearts & spiritual fruit here in Southeast Asia.
– Stand with us in prayer for the promised son.
– Financial support to keep us in the field doing what I am called to do.

2. Click Here to Donate via PayPal (tax deductible)!

Praise the Lord Jesus Christ!

And Thank You for your support!

“Little Drummer Boy”

Neighborhood children’s ministry, Cambodia, Christmas Ministry 2020

“But Jesus said, ‘Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto Me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.'” Matthew 19:14

នោះព្រះ‌យេស៊ូវទ្រង់មានព្រះ‌បន្ទូលថា ទុកឲ្យកូនក្មេងមកឯខ្ញុំចុះ កុំឃាត់វាឡើយ ដ្បិតនគរស្ថាន‌សួគ៌មានសុទ្ធតែមនុស្សដូចវារាល់គ្នា. ម៉ាថាយ 19:14

Praise the Lord Jesus Christ!

Merry Christmas from Cambodia!

Merry Christmas from Cambodia! May the Lord protect and bless!

Praise the Lord!

“Jesus, There’s Something about That Name” cover

“And He changeth the times and the seasons: He removeth kings, and setteth up kings…” Daniel 2:21

“Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.” Acts 4:12

“Jesus saith unto him, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by Me.'” John 14:6

Ex-Gay Testimony Dramatically Retold

Thanks to #Unshackled for revising (some details changed) & acting out my #ExGay #Testimony as a dramatic story for radio.

Click the following link to listen (30 mins) – https://unshackled.org/program/matthew-karchner-pg/

Praise the Lord!

Moved to support our ministry? Please click here.

Who’s the Boss?

Disclaimers: This video addresses God-ordained roles within marriage, not how a man is to lead if he strives to please God. This video purposes to answer a question that the church avoids at all cost, “Who’s the boss?” This is not about power and control. Man is not better than woman, and woman is not better than man. We serve different purposes.

I grew up in the church, and I remember what was being preached 30 years ago. Do you? What changed? Does culture trump the Word of God? Certainly not. Years ago, when Christian family had problems, they called the pastor. He sought counsel from God’s Word, not man’s opinion from “Christian” psychology books.

We represent the ex-gay community – men who have repented and put their faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ. Having experienced some degree of healing, many fragile men dream of one day following Christ into marriage with a woman. Our aim is to clear the path of obstacles. Praise the Lord.

This video addresses a massive boulder they will face, a boulder we trust the Lord to remove.

Imagine a group hike down a narrow, jungle path. As we encounter potholes, trees down across the path and branches in the way, we shout back to those behind us (younger believers) – warning them of danger… and to those ahead of us (older believers) to make straight the way for all.

Have you ever heard someone say the Bible doesn’t condemn homosexuality as sin? Sounds absurd, right? Why? Because it’s not stated one time but many times. It requires overlooking the obvious… repeatedly. It’s like arguing that the sky isn’t blue.

I was the guy who ran like a girl in gym class. Shame on the church when the Lord delivers a man from the gay community to remind us that man is the God-appointed head of the home. That’s when you know that we the church have fallen far, far away. We’re following psychology books, movements and Hollywood fairy tales.

What are some popular arguments?:
1) Christ is the head of the home, not man. Convenient way out of responsibility. That’s like saying, “Jesus saves”, so I don’t need to preach the gospel. Wrong.

2) Christ modeled servant leadership. Agreed, but how does that apply to this? Did He relinquish His role in a desperate attempt to prove humility? No, don’t use this as an excuse to emasculate a man.

3) My wife has more gifts than I have. Invalid argument. The Bible clearly appoints you as head of your home.

4) Mutual submission doctrine aims to discredit God’s Word in Ephesians chapter 5. Proponents cite that there were no “section headers” in the original Scriptures, which again, is absurd. Let’s take a look at God’s infallible Word together.

Verse 1-21 are obviously general directives to the church. Beginning at verse 22, husbands and wives are directly addressed with specific orders.

“1 Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children; 2 And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour. 3 But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints…  18 And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit; 19 Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord; 20 Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ; 21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. 32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”

(see bottom of page for additional supporting Scripture)

Imagine this scenario: If you walked into a wedding party and addressed the attendees in the ballroom with general instructions for the wedding reception, then you turned to the bride and grown, directly addressed them by title “Wife…”, “Husband…”, then gave them specific instructions, why would they choose to disregard what was directly addressed to them and instead opt to follow general directives to attendees? It makes no sense.

Ephesians 5:21 concludes general directives to the church at large. It comes prior to direct addresses to husbands and wives.

Taking verse 21 out of context (trying to cut & paste it into the next paragraph after husband & wife direct addresses) is an attempt to wash away direct orders to husband and wife respectively. This argument claims that the Bible calls for mutual submission – husband to wife and wife to husband. This false doctrine reduces the sacred husband-wife relationship to mere brother and sister in Christ.

Why do we avoid at all cost what the Lord has called us to do / be? Satan loves to reverse God-ordained roles – God & man, male & female, parent & child, husband & wife…  He loves to convince people that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.

Ungrateful for our own assignment (for which we have been gifted), we envy someone else’s and strive to prove we can do it better than they could. Some men may compete with their wives for the role assigned to them by the Most High. Think of how ridiculous all of this is.

Many give up and allow their wives to run the show. In trading God-ordained roles, we give up satisfaction and fulfillment. Emasculation can leave a man feeling useless. 

I personally believe that this popular erosion of God’s Word has contributed considerably to soaring divorce rates.

The husband is the head of the home without exception. There is no plan B.

Men, don’t allow yourself to be emasculated.

The following are NOT justifications for allowing your wife to head the home:

  1. Wife knows the Bible better than the husband.
  2. Husband has made bad choices in life.
  3. Wife is a natural leader with a strong personality.
  4. “But I am just a janitor, and my wife is president of a Fortune 500 company!”
  5. “But our culture favors women leaders.”

Sorry, brothers. The Lord put you in charge.

Does this sound appealing to you? Me neither. It is certainly not popular. Hollywood says a woman can head the home. Almighty God says she is not. Here comes the choice: Follow God’s Word or popular culture?

This is not a small thing. It’s a big thing. Getting this right is key to survival.

The role of head of the home is assigned. On the day of judgment, we men will be held accountable for what we did with our assigned role.

To us men, even those of us who once considered ourselves women, the Lord commands, ‘STEP UP!‘

“Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” – Genesis 2:18

“To the woman he said, I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.” – Genesis 3:16

“Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. For Adam was formed first, then Eve; and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.” – 1 Timothy 2:11-14

“Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.” – Titus 2:3-5

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” – 1 Peter 3:1-7

At the root of rejection of these Scriptures is unwillingness to accept ourselves as the Lord created us. No matter what I do, I will never be a woman. God created me to be a man. No matter what a woman does, she can’t be a man. Both of us could have surgery and live a fantasy, but we will never truly be what we were not created to be. Accept your God-given role. Be thankful. Praise the Lord.

Why Praise the Lord?

“Let everything that has breath praise the Lord . Praise the Lord!” Psalms 150:6

“Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Romans 10:9

“And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.” Matthew 28:18

“…the Holy Spirit who dwells within us…” 2 Timothy 1:14

“…the Helper, the Holy Spirit…” John 14:26

“If you are insulted for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you.” 1 Peter 4:14

“So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”
Genesis 1:27

“God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble.” Psalms 46:1

“You are worthy, O Lord, To receive glory and honor and power; For You created all things, And by Your will they exist and were created.” Revelation 4:11

“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” Genesis 1:1

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above…” James 1:17

My Story 3a: Envy

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:18

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” – Romans 8:28

Bible passages referenced in this video:  John 1:6-8, Mark 16:15, 2 Corinthians 4:4, Psalm 24:1, Matthew 28:18, Philippians 4:7, John 10:10, Philippians 4:19, Psalm 37:25, Exodus 14-16, Philippians 3:20, Romans 8:28, 1 Thessalians 4:13-18

Click here for the full song “Farther Along”.

Click here to watch “My Story”.

Click here to watch “My Story 2”.